I don't know if its apparent by now, but I was kind of a strange kid. :D Sure, I had other toys, but when it was time to play, that play gravitated not around guns or cars, but instead around the collection of soft toys my brother and I had amassed over the years. This involved attributing names and personalities to a bunch of teddies, and eventually voices, as this activity finally culminated in afternoon-spanning 'TV broadcasts' that were just a tinch inspired by seeing Muppets Tonight on TV.
As much as I wish that there was footage of, what I seem to remember being called Fluffy TV, sadly all I have left is hazy memories of it at this point. The titular Fluffies themselves do still survive though. During a tidy-up of my parents' attic a few years ago, I smuggled them out. And, even though I don't really remember the specifics of each one at this point, I thought it'd be fun to take a look at them anyway.
Let's meet the Fluffies!
Now these guys, I do remember. Here we have Dada Fluffy on the left and Mama Fluffy on the right. So, obviously, they're both the same monkey toy. My brother and I both got one as very young children.
I'm guessing he wasn't old enough to play with his at the time, but I made full use of mine, sleeping on it all the time, and thus transforming it into the dumpy-looking Dada Fluffy: a kind of beaten-down, grumpy patriarch over the whole Fluffy clan, if memory serves.
Mama Fluffy I remember as being a nicer, but also kind of naggy figure. So you know, strong female characters on Fluffy TV.
These two though I don't remember the specifics of at all. The blue bear on the right would have been a slightly more recent addition to the cast than most here. I suspect it came from a gift shop at some point. The little panda on the left though was one of the OG Fluffies though. I remember having him even as a tiny kid.
I can only speculate that his name was some riff on 'panda' given his shirt here: monogrammed by me, I'm sure. You know, the more I look at him in that shirt though, the more he looks kind of like a movie mafioso here. If was doing a gritty Zack Snyder reboot, he'd definitely be some kind of mob boss this time.
Oh my goodness! Even by my, uh.. impressive track record, I'm not sure I've ever been this quiet online for this long. Yikes though, between sifting through mountains of paperwork, keeping my garden ticking over, a giant cleanup operation and finally Christmas, I've barley had the energy for coherent thought for a good chunk of the last year. :D Lots of collapsing in front of the TV to watch superhero shows though. (Black Lightning and Titans: highly recommended.)
So, that cleanup: well, it started off simply enough with this little shed. I really wanted to get all the clutter out so I'd have a bit more storage space for tools and stuff. Then, in a highly uncharacteristic display of me taking things a bit too far, that quickly escalated into removing every bit of scrap metal, moldy wood and broken and/or useless junk from my dad's old farm.
About 64 cubic yards of garbage! This is about 20. Some pretty tough work, but it's great to finally be able to move around without constantly stepping over trash. I mean, I going to miss the thrill of possibly contracting tetanus at every step, but still, it's good.
Wow, remember when these things being two weeks late was the norm? 'Cause I barley do. :D So anyway, sometime - aeons ago, I think - E3 2019 happened. By all accounts a bit of a lackluster show this year. Sure we had Keanu and a few interesting reveals here and there, but also a ton of updates to previously released Games as a Service games, a real resurgence of (terrible-looking) mobile games and a near total lack information on Microsoft's streaming service and next console. Well aside from 'it'll have Halo on it'. Man, who could have seen that coming?
So, I was really looking to Nintendo's showing to, well, save E3, I guess. (Oh wow, am I one of those people now? Yikes!) But, with Luigi's Mansion 3, Link's Awakening, Mario Maker 2, Pokémon Sword & Shield, Animal Crossing, Astral Chain, and more already announced, coming soon, and sure to pop up here, what else could they possibly pull out here in service of E3's salvation?
Predictions!!!
- A New Zelda - The case against this is obviously the the presence of both the LA remake and Cadence of Hyrule on the horizon right now, but don't forget that BoTW was announced unexpectedly early too, and they should probably have something to show of the next game at this stage. I think we'll at least get a glimpse of it here.
- No Metroid Prime 4 - I'm sure they really regret announcing MP4 when they did, given what happened. I'll bet we don't see it again until it's a year out from release at most, and they're very confident they can actually hit that date.
- Some Square-Enix Western Announcements - S-E seem pretty on board with the Switch right now; haven't seen too much from the western side of the company yet though. I could definitely see the likes of Life is Strange, Sleeping Dogs, the 360/PS3 era Tomb Raider, Deus Ex and Just Cause games, and the S-E Collective stuff hitting the Switch in the not-too-distant future.
- No Bayonetta 3 Either - I saw, I think on Nintendo-Life, a recent statement from Platnium that development was 'proceeding well' or something along those lines. I get the sense from that that we're not due to see anything at least for a while yet.
- The Smash Character is from Dark Souls - So I'm sticking with my prediction that the DLC characters are all going to be third party characters that I'm not going to care about in the slightest. There was a rumor going around that the Dragon Quest character has been delayed, so I'm going with Dark Souls. We've already had the first game remastered on Switch, and an amiibo, and you could easily see this being tied into an announcement of Dark Souls II and III being Switch bound too.
- Fatal Frame - Still no sign of a Fatal Frame announcement for Switch, and I doubt Nintendo are done with it yet, especially given how much RE has bounced back with the last couple of installments. If there's going to be a Switch release, I'd imagine it'll be revealed soon.
- No Project X-Cloud Stuff - Yeah, judging by Microsoft's conference, their streaming stuff isn't quite ready for prime time yet. People have been expecting Xbox streaming to come to the Switch for months now. I think there's a pretty good chance it will, but I don't think it'll be announced here.
- A Ninja Gaiden Remaster/Remake - The 2004 one has never been on a Nintendo console, and I can see a portable version generating some interest, especially with there being a bit of an opening in the Switch library for character action games given Bayo 3's continued absence.
- Hitman 2 - If it's technically possible, I think there's a pretty good chance of this. Doesn't feel like Hitman 2 quite did the same business as the previous game. I can see it going portability as quite an attractive prospect for a lot of people though. It could be a big hit on Switch.
Huh. So yeah, in conclusion I guess E3 this year is pretty much doomed. :D
00:02 - Hmm. Always interesting to see the rating on these things. What could possibly be 18 rated coming up?.... Oh! Could just be the two id games. Both do look awesome, but man, I had my hopes up for a second for Bayonetta.
00:06 - Focusing prominently on Breath of the Wild here. Liking my chances of getting that first prediction right.
00:29 - Oh, come on!! I got very excited until I saw freakin' Marth here. :D Guess this is the new Smash character. Well, certainly looks grimdark enough for a Souls character.
00:47 - Hm, someone on horseback? Are there horses in the Souls games? Big expert here. Maybe this is the Dragon Quest guy.
01:18 - And there it is. Bleah! Or, idk, maybe he's a really cool character. Looking at him though, I don't really see any way that could possibly be true. :p
02:19 - Guessing these guys are probably the main characters from other Dragon Quest games. My Souls knowledge is only matched by my Dragon Quest knowledge.
03:01 - Oh, come on, Toriyama. That guy on the left is just Piccolo.
03:09 - So, from this, it looks like "The Hero" move set might be largely menu-based. That'd be weird. Also, you can maybe tag in other versions of the character, Pokemon Trainer style. Kind of different, but I just have no knowledge of Dragon Quest, so yeah, this is another pass for me. Feeling pretty good about not buying the Fighter's Pass right about now.
03:35 - I thought I was "The Hero". Jeez, make up your minds, Square-Enix.
04:45 - Oh snap! Guessing we're about to meet Doug Bowser.
05:15 - Okay, this is pretty cute.
05:32 - Oh, 'related'. Wow, I thought that said something very different for a second there.
06:12 - Okay, Luigi's Mansion 3. Really hoping this is a bit more like 1 than 2, or at least that it has freakin' checkpoints before it's very annoying bosses. (Literally just back playing some Luigi's Mansion 2 today. Thought 'man, why haven't I finished this?'. Got to the boss in Stage C-2. Annihilated by bombs and ghosts. Twenty minutes playing through the stage completely wasted. 'Oh right, that's why.')
06:42 - Ah, just like I deduced from that first trailer, this is set in a single location. I just hope the mission structure from 2 is gone and we're back to more open exploration in this.
07:31 - I was starting to get worried that all this swinging around meant motion controls, but with the button prompts showing up on screen, could it be QTE-based? Wow, that'd be way worse! :D
07:35 - Okay, it looks like the swing is on A every time. Luigi's Mansion not about to go full Shenmue just yet.
08:07 - Gooigi is an abomination, and must be stopped.
08:33 - Return to the abyss from which you came, Gooigi!
Wow! This one really fell through the cracks. From last September the 13th's Nintendo Direct, the coldest takes on Luigi's Mansion and Nintendo Switch Online; the hottest Katamari, Switch Pro Controller, and Splatoon trailer burns. Oh yeah, it's a spicy one!
00:01 - Pegi 18? Okay! Maybe finally some Bayonetta 3 here. (It's going to a Devil's Third Definitive Edition, isn't it? I just know it!)
00:25 - Aah! Full disclosure: I did see the title of this pop up beforehand. I'm just wondering which platform. Surely not 3DS. Just let it go, Nintendo.
00:33 - I hate to be down on this, but man, I'd be so much more excited for another Luigi's Mansion if I hadn't just put a bunch of time into Luigi's Mansion 2. I'm on to the third mansion at the moment, and it's just.. not really doing it for me. I feel like they took the relatively light puzzle-solving component of the first game and ratcheted it up to breaking point, cramming the game to the brim with irritating puzzles that always seemed to based on some obtuse action that never seems even remotely apparent. Maybe I'm just dumb. :D
00:37 - Well, this certainly looks like a Switch game anyway. Liking the Art Deco look here.
00:43 - Gah! That ghost looks unnervingly like Luigi, and it's freaking me out!
00:48 - Okay, next year and on the Switch. Hoping this one at least makes the puzzles more fun. Possibly reading too much into production art here, but I'm guessing from the size of that mansion that there won't be other mansions this time around. Could we we a see a return of a more open, Luigi's Mansion 1 style mansion, instead of LM2's missions too? Hope so!
00:55 - Hmm, Takahashi returning from E3's Direct? It really looked like they'd kind of settled on Koizumi for helming these, but I guess they're still kind of in experimentation mode.
01:23 - Boooooo! No, let's not.
01:33 - Wow, Kirby's Epic Yarn: there's a blast from the past. A really fun little game - don't get me wrong - but come on, why not a HD remaster on a platform it might actually sell on, Nintendo? I swear, it's getting harder and harder to understand their continued support for the 3DS with each passing Direct.
02:35 - Bowser Jr.!? Guessing this must be another Mario & Luigi port. Maybe Mario Sunshine? Nah, no way!
02:39 - Oh right, Bowser's Inside Story! I guess this isn't out yet. Ask me anything about the 3DS's 2019 release schedule.
02:55 - Go on Bowser Jr.'s journey? Finally!
03:50 - Yikes, that's even more unsettling than the Luigi ghost from earlier. (Edit: And this was before I even knew he was called Gooigi. *shudder*) Yeah, won't be picking up Luigi's Mansion again on the 3DS, though I expect I'd be having more fun replaying that than I'm having with 2 right now.
04:23 - Oh right! Wow, I forgot the New 3DS even had amiibo support. Speaking of which, I really need to grab the last of the Mario collection ones. That Luigi one: pretty sharp. Still no Luigi's Mansion amiibos though, even with TWO compatible games on the horizon! Hmm, yeah, after the new Smash Bros. ones, I have a feeling that Nintendo are getting out of amiibo business. *sigh* So many cool Zelda side characters that we'll never get.
04:46 - Wow, that bootleg Ecto-1 is blatant.
05:22 - No, I really don't know why, Voice-over Guy.
05:25 - Yeah, Voice-over Guy, I think I'm going to go and continue to ignore every aspect of the Yo-Kai Watch franchise. I's been working out pretty well for me so far.
05:31 - Oh, who could have possibly forgotten about the Moon Crew update? I mean, really.
It's 2018, I'm browsing the bargain section of a big UK candy importer's web site, just feeling the life leave my body. I decide that the time has come to take a break, not least because I still have a mountain of the freakin' stuff still left over from the last couple of years that I'm still trying to get through, like an idiot! So while I focus my energies this Halloween converting slightly softer and staler fare than usual into yet more body fat (:D), what better time to catch up on the last couple of years of Halloween candy consignments?
Well, providing that my impeccable and through notes, usually scrawled down in the middle of the night while watching some random horror movie, make even a lick of sense at this point at least. There seem to be a lot of them at the very least, so let's give it a crack!
Mr. Kipling Toffee Terror Whirls
Starting off with some of the more seasonally-appropriate fare, or hmm, well, maybe not. What is it with UK companies and Halloween variations on their products? Toffee apple, say, would have been a great Halloween-themed flavour here. Toffee on it's own though, I really don't associate with this time of year at all. I don't get why you'd go to the effort of producing a limited edition flavour of your regular Viennese Whirls for Halloween and make it toffee.
As for the Terror Whirls themselves, they're pretty much just regular old Viennese Whirls - a lovely, buttery shortcrust pastry with a a nice, creamy buttercream filling, but this time with a barley noticeable toffee syrup under that buttercream. As good as these still are, for a limited edition Halloween product, they're a real let down. 3/5
Cadbury Screme Egg Biscuits
Speaking of disappointing seasonal variations, we covered standard Screme Eggs all the way back in 2010. Now here they are, finally in biscuit form! So, these are basically shortbread chocolate biscuits - nice texture, good chocolate flavour. You don't really notice the Screme Egg filling too much though, which is a good thing. I pealed off the top of one of these and licked that filling, purely for scientific purposes, and ick! It's sickly and unpleasantly sweet. It has a slightly different texture to the filling in the actual Screem Eggs though - it's thinner and more gelatinous, which somehow makes it even less palatable. Still, the biscuit itself is pretty good, so partial credit. 3/5
Cadbury Pumpkin Patch Cakes
"Orange coloured creme" - I'd love if Cadbury would just once make something with a unique flavor for Halloween. Much like the Screme Egg biscuits above, these are just a recolored and reconfigured version of an existing Cadbury cake product. Well, at least they're upfront about it. :D, These are still pretty good though: you get a decent amount of that creme - which is a nice, rich buttercream; a chocolate coating that's almost, but not quite Dairy Milk chocolate; and a good-quality, soft sponge cake holding it all together. 4/5
Mysterious Halloween Chocolate Coins
Strangely there's no brand on these - they're made in Italy and that's about all the info you're given: somewhat worrying. The designs an the wrappers I think are really cute here though - I especially like the witch. The chocolate is of a pretty decent quality too, so, you know what, I'll take the risk that these are probably some kind cursed Halloween candy that someone left on a store shelf, designed to inflict endless pain and suffering on anyone who consumes it. Having already forced myself to sit through most of the Leprechaun movies though, I'm pretty sure I can handle it. (Oof!) :D 3/5
Yeah, I meant to quickly follow up the 2014 post with this one, but I seem to have gotten slightly side tracked again. :D So, kind of the same deal again this time. I managed to get my hands on a grand total of one Halloween-themed thing in 2015. There was nothing to do but to continue my descent into the vast well of US candy. *sploosh*
Mm. It's like I'm drowning in a sea of high-fructose corn syrup.
Jaffa Cakes Scary Cake Bars
Hey, why not? Let's start off with the only real Halloween thing here: Lemon and "Slime" flavoured Jaffa Cake bars.
I really loved the tangy layer of jelly here: it had a nice, tasty lemon and lime flavour that I thought went great with the dark chocolate coating. The base here though, I found a little dry. I guess it had about the same consistency as the bases in regular Jaffa Cakes - which I love, dearly :D - but in a cake bar like this, with a much thicker layer of cake-type stuff, I'd have preferred it to be a little moister. I'll give these a four out of five.
/ 5
Naturally, I'm rating everything here on a scale of tossers from RTE Two's embarrassing current idents out of 5, with making-tweed-cap-cool-again guy being the lowest, and inappropriate-internet-posting guy being the highest.
No wonder no one watches TV any more.
Junior Mints
A brand I've heard thrown around a lot in old sitcoms and the like; inside these was a soft - I'd say even bordering on wet - mint fondant, surrounded by what the pack claims is "rich dark chocolate", but it seemed to have the taste and texture of a pretty so-so chocolate-flavoured coating to me. The fondant was great though; there was a real good mintiness to it. And while the coating didn't quite live up to the pack's lofty claims, it was still serviceable enough to give you the classic, dark chocolate and mint combination they're going for. That, along with the melt in the mouth fondant made these addictive as hell.
/ 5
Wonka Nerds Bumby Jelly Beans
These guys were jelly beans on the inside, surrounded by thick, hard, bumpy shells. The shells I really loved. They had a great mouth feel to them, to borrow a phrase from the early days of the Bombcast: sort of pleasingly smooth, but bumpy at the same time (insert dildo joke here). The flavours I thought were great too, though they weren't especially easy to identify. I'm still not sure what the red and green ones were supposed to be. But, along the grape, lemon and orange, they were very tasty nonetheless. The jelly beans inside though, aside from being vaguely sweet, I found to be almost flavourless. Granted, I'm not a big fan of jelly beans in general, but I still feel I've had better than the ones inside here. Those shell though: damn.
/5
Hawaiian Punch Candy Chews
Maybe I just saw the wrappers here and jumped to conclusions, but I was really expecting these to be taffy, pretty much. Unfortunately, the chewiness just wasn't there. These started off with a consistency kind of like chewing gum before quickly melting away into nothing. Even as basic chews, I wouldn't really rate these. Getting on to the flavours, these were quite a mixed bad, if you'll excuse the terrible pun. The green berry wasn't bad, falling somewhere between lime and apple; not really getting the "berry" though. The orange was pretty much your typical bad orange candy flavour, which always tastes to me like a gross satsuma. The blue ones, I guess if you use your imagination you could just about get a blue raspberry flavour from them, but to me - and maybe my taste buds are fucked at this point :D - they tasted quite similar to the orange ones, so also terrible. The lemon berry squeeze definitely had a hint of lemon in there, but the prevailing flavour I got from them was, weirdly, cherry cola. Those were actually pretty damn good though. Finally, the fruity juicy reds; it might be further evidence that my taste buds have packed in, but cherry cola was what I got from these ones too, just a slightly more watered-down version. Still, those were petty good too. A few good flavours, but overall, these were quite disappointing.
/5
0% Vitamin A, C, Calcium and Iron. That's good eatin'!
