Nintendo Direct 01/09/2016 (EU): Not-so-live Impressions

A Direct I was going to skip, but having glanced at some spoilers a few hours ago, hoo boy did it look like they had some surprises to drop in this one. :D Let's watch!

• 00:31 - That's where you're wrong, Mr. Shibata. My interest in Pokémon Go remains precisely zero. To be honest, my interest in seeing more Sun and Moon is about the same. :D
• 00:45 - Rowlet is still pretty dope though.
• 00:52 - Ohhhh! Litten - a fire kitten. Man, they're killing it with the Pokémon names in this one.

• 03:24 - Still just looks like another Pokemon game though. :P Oh okay, I guess the regional pokémon are kind of a neat idea. And I do like the look of this 3DS. Wait, "software not included"? Come on, Nintendo, don't Battlefield 1 out on us.

• 03:49 - Okay, I know what this is from earlier. You think it's going to be yet another New Super Mario Bros., but...

• 03:55 - ...whaaaaat!? It's Mario Maker for the 3DS.

• 04:01 - Super Mario Maker for Nintendo 3DS eh? I didn't think they could top Super Smash Bros for Wii U/3DS as a clunky name, but with the addition of "Nintendo" here, I think they've done it.

• 04:12 - Ugh, spring blocks on top of spring blocks. I'm having horrible Course World flashbacks. 
• 04:26 - You know, I've barley touched the Nintendo-made courses in the Wii U version. The ones I've played were decent, but they just seem so plain compared to the user-created levels. Granted, there are lots of bad user-created levels, but even those can often be interesting. I always think they're kind of like stepping inside someone else's brain. :D
• 04:54 - Hold up. You can't search for a level with its Course ID in this version? Whoa! I presume the Mario Maker Bookmark site won't work either then. Damn. That's a huge part of the game to leave out. That'll stop anyone from loading up any specific level they want to check out - from forum threads, videos, Reddit, Twitch, whatever. They'll be left with only the randomness of the 100 Mario Challenge and the ever mysterious whims of the Recommended Courses. That's a genuine bummer.
• 05:05 - Good to hear that every existing course will be available in this version at least (even if no one will ever find them).

• 05:10 - I guess this version will feature the full-fledged level creation mode though. I'm looking to see if there any new tools in the menu here. Hm, don't think so, but they have broken out some of the things that you need to shake other items to get and given them their own slots, like the key and the skewer, and that weird skinny mushroom. Wouldn't be a bad update for the Wii U version, Nintendo. The Wii U set-up has gotten kind of weird and hard to keep track of at this stage.
• 05:24 - No mystery mushroom? You know what, forget what I said earlier, this is clearly best version of Super Mario Maker. :D

• 05:33 - Was this weird pigeon in the Wii U version? I wouldn't know, having no need to play through the tutorial. La-de-dah.

• 06:00 - Oh, for fuck's sake, Nintendo. You can't even upload courses from this version!? :D No one's building close-knit Mario Maker communities via wireless; certainly not outside Japan. So this version of Mario Maker is basically a glorified 100 Mario Challenge app then? Boy, they better not be charging full price for this.

• 06:51 - A new mode in Mario Party where everyone can play as a toad? Finally. I can't complain too much about this Mario Party though, not when they're using it as an excuse to release those awesome Mario series amiibos in a couple of months. Pre-orders down already? You bet.
• 07:07 - Action-packed mini-games. That'll be a change for the series. :D

• 08:19 - Fuck yes, look at that Diddy Kong amiibo! So, I have him, Daisy and Waluigi pre-ordered. DK and Wario, I don't think'll be  that hard to find. Boo, I'm still not sold on; maybe if there's a good deal on that one later on.

• 08:23 - Who am I kidding? I'm definitely getting the Boo amiibo :D. I might still wait for a deal though. Amiibos don't seem to be hot ticket item they used to be. I was surprised to see a bunch of them being sold by Amazon for under £5 back in July.

And seeing quickly led to buying.

• 09:14 - They're doing a free multiplayer client/single player demo for this? Goodness knows why, but I kind of want to give this a download.

• 09:34 - Zelda? They're probably not going to announce the new orchestra CD or art book on this Direct, I'd imagine. Amiibos maybe?
• 09:40 - No, wait. It's totally just going to be freakin' Hyrule Warriors Legends DLC, isn't it? :D

• 09:37 - Oh. I guess this is the art book. Looking good. Meanwhile at the Metroid 30th anniversary: *tumbleweeds*

• 10:06 - Fucking wait, WHAT?! Holy shit! YES! Finally!!! Zelda amiibos! Let's see what we have here. Pixel Link looks a bit derpy, but I'll have to pick him up, if only to put next to pixel Mario. OoT Link looks great. Wind Waker Link looks good; I kind of prefer the Smash Bros. one I already have though. Toon Zelda, I'm excited to finally have on the way, but - and this may be the saddest thing I've ever uttered - I'm a bit disappointed with her pose; I would have preferred her firing a light arrow, maybe. Still, there's no way I'm not putting down a pre-order for her as soon as possible. Love the gold bases too.
• 10:16 - They'll work with Breath of the Wild? I wonder if any of them will unlock companion characters, like the Wolf Link amiibo. Running around with pixel Link as a companion would be... weird. :D Speaking of Breath of the Wild, finally saw Princess Mononoke last week - awesome movie, and damn, is there a bunch of stuff Nintendo cribbed from it in Breath of the Wild. Most surprisingly, the BotW trailer music that I liked so much back at E3. It's very close to some parts of the Mononoke score, like cease and desist close. Hopefully no one important notices. :D

• 10:33 - Speaking of scores... I'd love to go see Symphony of the Goddesses, but I'd be stunned if it ever makes it here. Like I mentioned before though, at least we have another compilation to look forward to. The one that came bundled with Skyward Sword was great. (Edit 23/10/16: Sorry if I got anyone's hopes up here. I just got the CD in question a few days ago and it's most definitely NOT a Symphony of the Goddesses compilation, more a companion piece to the Mario 30th anniversary compilation, with 2 CDs of tracks ripped from the games. Kind of neat, cool packaging, but not at all what I was expecting. I should have probably waited for a track listing or some further news to go up, but after seeing it announced, erroneously, on some random web site, I immediately jumped in and pre-ordered it. That's what you get for listening to some random idiot on the internet, I guess. :D)

• 10:44 - Wow, speak of the devil. :D Still have my copy from 2011 though. Not one of my favourites to be honest. Not because of the motion controls though, which I think work pretty well for the most part. It was the amount of filler and the lack of a propper overworld that didn't do it for me.

• 10:55 - Huh? Are they going to put out the Famicom Disk System version of Zelda on the Virtual Console? That'd be kind of neat. Hey, they could even pull off the microphone stuff with the Wii U gamepad now.

• 11:14 - No, it was just a lead-in to the NES Classic Mini. Pre-order down already? Oh, you bet. :D I probably need this even less than the amiibos though. It's mostly the size, the rad box design and the NES classic controller that are selling me on it so far. I think I have most of the games on it in some form already. I didn't even wait for a confirmation that they're not crappy PAL versions that look as bad as NES games on the Wii U. Hopefully not.

• 12:05 - Pretty sure this is the trailer that's already been released for the NES Classic. "Do you remember the good old days?" Sure - playing all these games in Nesticle in the year 2000 while listening to trance and freakin' nu-metal. Your 80's, CRT-fuelled nostalgia holds no power over me, Nintendo.

• 12:28 - I do remember though, the good old days of repeatedly turning the power button on and off on a NES we bought a few years earlier (while holding the cartridge down, of course) in order to get it to work. Good times.

• 12:32 - 60 Hz. Okay, that's good. HD though? I mean, NES games on the Wii U are outputted in "HD". :D I'm not going to believe they look good on this until I see some direct feed video from one. I mean, yeah, the footage they've had in these trailers looks exactly as I'd want it to, but after the Wii U, I'm a firm Nintendo emulation sceptic.

• 12:47 - It's so tiny though! And that's why I'll end up not cancelling that pre-order no matter what. :D

• 13:17 - Damn it. I knew we wouldn't get through this without more Hyrule Warriors Legends.
• 13:38 - Phantom Hourglass and Spirit Tracks packs. Great, my favourites. :D Never even tried Spirit Tracks actually, not after I gave up on Phantom Hourglass after the first few dungeons. Bleh, pretty much the only part I enjoyed of that was the intro, and only because that made me think of The Wind Waker. The controls, the bland world, replaying that stupid dungeon: no thanks.

• 14:47 - Oh, that's kind of cool. Amiibo functionality coming to Animal Crossing: New Leaf. It seems pretty late in the day to be patching new content into that though. I wonder if this is stuff they had started working on for the Wii U version.
• 15:10 - Boo! Amiibo cards. What a blight on humanity.

• 15:45 - They're releasing a new physical version of New Leaf with the amiibo stuff built-in. And I thought Super Mario Maker 3DS was a weird move. Oh sorry, Super Mario Maker for Nintendo 3DS. Of course.
• 15:52 - There's going to be Animal Crossing Nintendo Direct? To announce what?
• 15:54 - Oh, wait! The mobile version. Completely forgot.

• 16:01 - A physical release for Rhythm Paradise Megamix. I still need to put more time into that series before I'd grab this one, but it's always nice to have the option of a physical version.

• 17:38 - Dragon Quest VII. I actually just picked up my first Dragon Quest the other day: Dragon Quest I &II for the Super Famicom. It'll be a while before I make it up to VII. :)

• 19:23 - Hm, I wonder if the PS2 version of Dragon Quest VIII can still be had for cheap...... Hang on........ Okay, it's still like €10-15. I should get that. Carry on, Shibata.

• 19:54 - Picross 3D 2. The original was a handheld game; of course I never played it. I hear it's very good though.
• 20:47 - Oh, it's coming out on the Wii U Virtual Console now. :D I'd get it, but there's no way you wouldn't be playing that primarily on the gamepad screen. Nah, I'll pick up the DS version. One day.
• 20:52 - Sizzle reel time, I guess.
• 20:58 - Federation Force. Yikes!

• 21:06 - A wild Wii U game appears! I'm kind of tempted to get Fast Racing Neo, just because it's on a disc now. I wonder how that turned out; there didn't seem to be a whole lot of coverage of it. Also yikes: Sonic Fire and Ice.
• 21:08 - Paper Mario: Color Splash. *sigh* I want another Paper Mario so badly, but this seems to be that in name and art style only. Maybe it'll still be good, for what it is. We'll see.

• 21:14 - Disney Magical World 2. Huh? This is a pretty lean line-up. Is the rest of the schedule just the wowit'sfuckingnothing GIF? :D

• 21:35 - Close enough. Hardware? There's more filler in this schedule than in Skyward Sword. :D

• 21:45 - ♫ It'll be lonely this Christmas, lonely and cold. It'll be cold, so cold... ♫

• 23:28 - Another handy time-saving tip for Street Pass: leave your 3DS on top of a stack of Retro Gamers and never play it.

• 24:50 - Tank Troopers. Seems to be sort of a Nintendo take on hero-based multiplayer games crossed with BattleTanx. Not really doing a lot for me.

• 25:06 - You wouldn't think third parties would have a whole lot left to put out on 3DS, but looks like we're getting an actual sizzle reel here. Still haven't touched anything Phoenix Wright. The Sherlock Holmes one sounded interesting. I don't think this is that one though.

• 25:26 - Sonic Boom: Fire and Ice looking rough. Sonic Advance this ain't.

• 25:56 - 7th Dragon III Code: VFD. Damn, I think Sega's just overtaken Square-Enix in the weird JRPG naming game. Good to see they're still making games outside Sonic and Total War though.
• 26:00 - So much for the third-party sizzle reel. Nindies!

• 26:15 - Wow, Axiom Verge really does look a hell of a lot like Super Metroid. Haven't picked it up yet though; as ever, holding out for a bargain.

• 26:41 - Severed. This looks neat; nice art style; first person combat maybe. Interesting.
• 26:59 - 10% off the Nindies for launch week. After years of discounts on PC, I'm afraid that's not going to do much for me, Ed.

• 27:11 - Yoshi! Poochy! Please tell me there's a yarn Poochy amiibo coming. Actually, what is this though? A cut-down version of Yoshi's Wolly World for 3DS?

• 27:20 - Yep! Oof, dat visual downgrade.

• 27-42 - So you can play as Poochy in this version. He seems to control more like Mario here than Yoshi. I guess he was fast before, but this is some jumping finesse he definitely didn't have with Yoshi riding on top of him.

• 27-54 - Poochy pups. Eww, they look like those weird penguin/snowmen things that followed you around in the snow levels in Yoshi's Island.
• 28-07 - Nintendo really have a fixation with making animated shorts at the moment, don't they? Eh. Get Disney or Pixar to make a feature, then we'll talk.

• 28:17 - They certainly look well-done though.

• 28:22 - OH FUCK YES!!! I've been hoping for a Poochy amiibo since the moment I laid eyes on him in Woolly World. I hope I won't have to buy this version just to get him. But I will.

• 28:35 - Hnnnnng!

• 28:54 - Is it just me, or does this screen scream "fashion catalogue".

• 29:58 - Ever Oasis - another handheld JRPG, because of course. :D I really hope that some of the 3DS RPGs from the last few years will get ported to the NX. Goodness knows I'll never play them otherwise.

• 31:03 - Mario Sports Super Stars. Got to say, they have a lot more still on the way for the 3DS than I would have expected.

• 31:34 - Football; baseball; tennis; golf: all the hits... and horse racing.
• 32:05 - This really seems like a nice package. Disappointed (but not surprised) it's 3DS only. Hey, at least someone's still keeping arcade sports games alive.

• 32:43 - Here we go. :D This is the one I've been waiting for. Good news, everyone: another cult Nintendo favourite is being turned into a 3DS game that plays nothing like the original game. :D
• 33:39 - To be fair though, this seems to be retaining much more of what makes Pikmin Pikmin than Federation Force or Zip Lash. However, remember the Pikmin game that Miyamoto was saying was nearly complete last year? Viola. Everyone thought "Pikmin 4", but this is almost certainly the game he was talking about.

• 35:15 - "Happy gaming!" Not if handheld gaming isn't your thing apparently. :D I guess I'll just have to console myself with all those sweet, sweet amiibos. 

Next up, the NX reveal, right? Right? It has to be coming up soon. Doesn't it? I mean, people on NeoGAF are building cardboard replicas of it, based on rumoured dimensions from some obscure web site. How long will you let this madness persist, Nintendo? :D